Soggy Still binding
Terms
Soggy Biscuit, at soggybiscuit.fun, lets you write a bit and have one of four characters say it on a phone call. These terms are the rules. The jokes are free. The rules are not optional.
The account is yours
Sign up with email and a password. Google sign-in appears when it is switched on. There is no shared password. You keep your login private. We may suspend an account that breaks the safety and consent policy.
Biscuits
One biscuit is one second of calling. A new account starts with 25 biscuits. They stay in the tin until a call spends them. There is no monthly refill. You need a positive balance to place or schedule a call. The call hangs up when the tin runs out, and never runs longer than ten minutes. The seconds actually used are taken when the call ends.
Bigger tins are sold by card when the shop is open. Card details go to the card processor. soggybiscuit.fun stores the purchase and the biscuits credited, not the card number.
Admins have unlimited biscuits and are not debited. An admin can grant or adjust another account’s balance. That change is written to the audit log. A practice call still spends the seconds it ran, taken when you hang up.
Calls
- You supply the number, the name, and the bit. You are responsible for having a lawful reason to call.
- Live phone calls happen only when the operator has set live dialling on. Otherwise nothing is rung.
- The opener is “Hey [name]” unless your bit specifies other wording.
- Calls stop at ten minutes, or sooner if the biscuit tin runs out. Wrap up asks him to end on the word goodbye. Hang up ends it immediately.
- He will not make a booking, take a payment, or promise either.
Your prompts and voices
Prompts you save are private to your account unless an admin publishes one. Only use a voice you have the right to use. The phone voices are Harry, Bernie, Sally, and Gazza.
Recordings
Live calls can store a recording. You can play it from your history. A share link is opt-in and can be revoked. A practice call does not produce a phone recording.
The service can be paused
An admin can pause new calls until that pause is lifted. Calls already in progress stay up until someone hangs up.
No warranty of comedy
The model improvises. It can miss the joke, mishear a menu, or stop early. The hard limits are the part we insist on. The laugh is not guaranteed, and neither is the biscuit staying dry.